Grown up!

I am angry at the world tonight!

You know when you just get in one of them woman-esque moods, a few things happen and then BAM you're left hating the universe! haha. I suppose my serotonin imbalance doesn't help.

I move into my first place next weekend, a beautiful spacious apartment, conveniently situated close to town for them nights I decide to have a little too much to drink :) I'm moving in with a friend, I've only known this friend a few years, we've only really connected in the past 6months and grown close in the past 8 weeks.. I like this factor to our friendship, where you still have a lot to learn about a person but you also know that the connection can only continue to grow. I would have loved my very own place but I think for cost implications it was technically more intelligent of me to go with the 'flat mate' status at this point in my life.

I had a realisation today, I am becoming a 'Grown Up'!!

I think over the past 3 weeks I have really turned a corner in my life. Today i found myself speaking like an adult to an adult and the adult actually listened to what I said as if I was some higher power of being. haha!

Personally I believe it comes with my new job (my first career-type role) to have a high standard of authority in your tone and stance. I have learnt that from my manager, but to actually be capable to pull it off? I think it takes confidence and guts and that 'I am incharge! I know what I am doing!' look, which Grown Up's have to present themselves with, whether it be at work with collegues or at home with their children.

To be perfectly honest I think I scared myself silly with it... but then I realised how hard I have worked over the past month in my new role. Working WITH pressure and stress, not against it (as many would) and seeing things through, as you should.

I think the idea of having my own place has only shifted the 'transformation' forward a notch, in a good way. I'm not quite the homely perfectionist, with her feather dusters and manic washing up, yet! but I know what I want and I'm going for it at full-speed!

I have so much to look forward to right now and the confidence high is really working for me, I just need to keep my head and remember where I come from, which I will do.. I'm a very family and friendship orientated person, I'm grounded and there is no doubt that it is going to stay that way.

Anyone who knows me will comment on my 'young at heart' personality, I laugh a lot at the most unhumorous things and I enjoy everything about being alive. My favourite story was and always will be J.M.Barrie's Peter Pan :) I always live by the motto 'I will never Grow Up' but I'm also loving the corporate side of me, the straight-talking business side... can we say split personality?! ha!

Here are a few of them 'Grown Up' qualities I'm currently fashioning:

The Career: A 'Big Girl' job, as soppy as it sounds! People have started to listen to me, not simply talking AT me but speaking WITH me, taking my advice and most of all, saying 'Thankyou'.. a word which is like a prayer to my ears!

Responsibility:

Simple as.

Fitness: I used to be 14st!!!! I am now 10st 7lbs!!! I know the important of staying healthy. I no longer feel the need to drink excessively. If I'm going to keep my slim frame I need to work at it and be strict about it, there is no other way.. plus, I enjoy the probability of living longer *touches wood*

Money: I hate that word!, I have never in my life liked the prospect of taking care of my own money.. I am a spender! My friends are spenders! Ashamedly, I have had to start counting the pennies and keeping track of my expenses, if I did not, the rent, bills and essentials would not get paid for. I am lucky that as a young adult (and most of my friends) I have not bathed in the glory of a credit card for several years! I look at the position I could be in and give myself praise.. I did one thing right in my kidulthood!

Some people I know have suffered the unfortunate circumstance of having to grow up extremely fast, I'm happy to be inbetween. I had the most amazing childhood, I adored being a teenager and as of yet I have not had to complain to the heavens about my position as a young adult.

The fact is, we would all love to believe that being a 'Grow Up' would never be an issue for us, I am just happy to say that my personality remains the same as when I was extremely small.. I'm still spontaneous, I laugh a lot and completely inappropriately at times, I cry when I don't get my way, I am still a complete geek with no sense of fashion and I often make mistakes with no ability to regret...

To be honest, that 'Grown Up' feeling isn't much different from when you achieved your first period or kiss... Okay, maybe complete opposite ends of the scale there!! But I guess I am just that little bit wiser and more sure of myself than before, my maturity has come along nicely, I can have a proper conversation about world affairs (or in my instance, the politics of Xfactor) but all inkeeping with the pure fact that I will always be a big kid at heart!

...Well I guess this is growing up!